Totally Married

Elizabeth and Andy reflect on the year, discuss why she thinks she was a man in a past life and then give their unqualified advice to listener questions about what to do about processing a past assault, how to deal with a Mother In Law who always steals your Christmas gift thunder, how to deal with a partner who is unwilling to pick up after himself or participate in family life? Also a fun update from a past listener who BOUNCED! See you in the New Year and Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedEp327.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

Elizabeth and Andy discuss new schedules and the unsolvable mysteries of life before giving their unqualified advice to listener questions about getting closure on a friendship that ended without your say, how to be supportive of your sister during her labor, and lastly a doozy about the emotional side of weight gain in marriage which leads to a long discussion about weight and bodies and all that jazz! Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedEp326.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

Andy stumps Elizabeth with a hypothetical ethical question before a healthy political pocket and their unqualified answer to a listener question about whether or not it's okay to fantasize about an ex in order to keep the steam alive in your marriage? Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedEp325.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

Elizabeth and Andy share their podcast future plans which involve this very podcast! (Not to worry, they aren't going anywhere) Then they give their unqualified advice to listener questions about dealing with a neighbor who is spreading ignorant rumors, how to judge a political representative based on their NRA rating, whether to buck a wedding tradition for your own principles or just go along with it to appease others, how to deal with a friend who is not self aware and tends to bad-mouth other friends, whether to bounce or not from a job that is draining (sorry for not fully answering this one! We got distracted!) and lastly, what to do about a boss who is making you uncomfortable and bordering on sexual harassment? Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedEp324.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

Andy and Elizabeth discuss gratitude and some special "Dad" sightings this holiday season. Then they give their (still!) unqualified advice to listener questions about how to approach a major breach of trust in a relationship because of a seemingly very dumb lie, and where to get informed and trusted political guidance in order to ace those political debates and text your representatives. Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedEp323.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

Elizabeth and Andy discuss family planning and Andy gives Elizabeth an early Christmas gift! Then, many political pockets later (haha) they give their unqualified advice to listener questions about a fiance who isn't budging on major life choices, how to navigate the subject of religion with a toddler, when you aren't religious, and how to proceed in a divorce with love and respect and well-being for your child first and foremost. Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedep322.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

Elizabeth and Andy discuss the recent doc that helped her feel that there is a god in this otherwise seemingly dumpster fire of an existence in Trumpland! An added bonus of discussion about sexual assault, and the recent scandals. Then they give their unqualified advice to listener questions about whether or not to take depression meds during pregnancy, how to heal hurt feelings over a pregnancy reveal, and how to find a therapist who is effective when you have no time and no money? Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedEp321.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

Elizabeth shares her good work news and talks about the thing that saved her anxious mind while waiting for the news (spoiler alert: It's OPRAH) Then she and Andy discuss the latex glove mystery of their week before giving their incredibly unqualified advice to listener questions about navigating a tumultuous family relationship especially in front of your kids, how to deal with roommates who agreed to the rules and are now rebelling against them, and how to cope with trying to conceive anxiety as well as baby-name differences? Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedEp320.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

Happy Halloween Laimewads!! We start the episode with some excited news about future podcast plans! Then we discuss some spooky Hallow's eve stuff - pumpkins, mummies, ghosts, oh my!! We end with our answers to listener questions about dealing with ghosts, and how to deal with the horror of being a true blue democrat in a very red town - now that's terrifying! Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedEp319.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

Elizabeth and Andy follow up to her assault story from last week with a bananas update! Then they discuss the question on everyone's mind: how many garbage bins worth of refuse fit into a garbage truck? Then they give their unqualified advice to listener questions about getting closure from a friend who ghosted you in a time of need, and how to cope with mother-in-law directed rage? Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedEp318.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

(TRIGGER WARNING) Elizabeth and Andy discuss their memorable experiences from Halloween to Ghosts, as well as a big, intense discussion about sexual assault and misogyny in Hollywood and beyond. Then they give their unqualified advice to listener questions about whether or not it was childish to bounce from someone for forgetting a birthday, and if it's morally okay to move in with someone when finances play a role in the choice? Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedEp317.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

Elizabeth and Andy discuss the merits/pitfalls of the concept of faking it 'til you make it, as well as share stories of their attempts at it! After a (hopefully) positive political pocket, they give their unqualified advice to listener questions about what to do to help an alcoholic mother and also protect yourself, and how to navigate anti depressants while trying to conceive, through pregnancy and beyond? Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedEp316.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

Today we discuss the art of meeting people where they are in life and why that's so effing difficult! Also, more discussion about lice! (Oy vay!) Then we answer one very thought-provoking listener question about how to address major depression in an older parent who would be resistant to the idea of therapy? Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedEp315.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

Elizabeth and Andy discuss Andy's likability factor, Elizabeth's inability to "read the room" and Andy's recent foray into carpentry. Then they give their unqualified advice to listener questions about how to fit in sex after kids, at what age does nudity around kids become weird, how to break it to in laws that you are moving to be closer to the other grandparents, whether to bounce from a friend group who leaves you feeling less than qualified, and how to maintain a good relationship with a sister in law who constantly feels victimized or judged? Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedEp314.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

Elizabeth and Andy make a spur of the moment decision to try instagram-live-ing this episode, so bear with them! They discuss butt itch, body image and new frontiers before giving their unqualified advice to listener questions about how to be a supportive friend during the labor and delivery of your bestie's first child, whether or not a college degree is necessary to get into a career in writing, and what to do about a special relationship in which you suddenly get ghosted? Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedEp313.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

Elizabeth and Andy discuss their future podcasting endeavors as well as the moments in life that make them feel most content/present! Then they give their unqualified advice to listener questions about dealing with an immature roommate who won't take responsibility for her actions, and how to navigate a parenting challenge with a partner who doesn't see eye to eye with you on what to do? Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedep312.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

Are humans inherently good? Are flies really not just mosquitos? Are tomatoes supposed to stay planted year round? These questions and more are posed by Elizabeth and andy and... not answered. They do, however give their unqualified advice to listener questions about a fun entry level DJ gift for your spouse, how to navigate a partner leaving you high and dry in order to serve those in need, and what to do about long term friendships that are not supportive of your marriage? Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedEp311.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

Elizabeth and Andy discuss stigmas in their many forms - weed! sex workers! self care! Then the stigmata continues as they discuss navigating conversation thresholds in an open marriage, and how to heal from an unspoken hurt after a botched proposal when the conversation is so loaded? Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedEp310.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

Elizabeth and Andy discuss the glorious Craigslist score they just made as well as a really sad story for Elizabeth vs. a sweet innocent bird. Then they give their unqualified advice to listener questions about how to overcome ingrained body image issues to rock some lingerie, and a question about small talk etiquette in an office? Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedEp309.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

Elizabeth and Andy discuss weather emergencies, the fragility of life and how important the arts and inspiration is to humanity. Then they give their unqualified advice to listener questions about what to do about a family pet that is suffering and acting aggressively, and how to navigate a marriage to someone who is a good guy at heart but a not so nice guy in the relationship? Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedEp308.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

Elizabeth and Andy discuss a recent harrowing social experience at Le Pain Quotidien as well as the new levels of hell for Elizabeth that is going to Ikea. Then they give their unqualified advice to listener questions about coping with success jealousy in a serious relationship, how to navigate a difficult mother in law on behalf of your sister in law after having a baby, and how to deal with a brother in law who is a trash bag, potentially bordering on being an abusive one? Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedEp307.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

Elizabeth and Andy are in their new house and it feels so good! They discuss Andy's upcoming short film about pooper scoopers as well as their vivid moving memories from childhood. No questions this week because they are lost somewhere in a sea of boxes! Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedep306.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

Elizabeth and Andy share their joy in their new house regarding things like doors on rooms and a fridge ready with... wait for it... CRUSHED ICE!!! Then they give their unqualified advice to listener questions about how to deal with friends who are only about their children and the big question about whether or not to have kids in tandem with that, what to do when you see someone's kid pee in public without their knowing, how to respond to people's obnoxious comments regarding having an only child, and what to do about a roommate/trash bag who doesn't wash their hands after the latrine?! Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedEp305.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

Elizabeth and Andy discuss the stresses of life, both self imposed and life imposed, as well as the need for self protection in this crazy world right now. Then they give their unqualified advice to listener questions about how to know if you want a third child or not, and whether to listen to your biological clock or your mental health cues for when it's time to start trying?

Direct download: TotallyMarriedep304.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

Elizabeth and Andy discuss their game night memories before sharing some sad news about a pet-friend, and their three year olds' beautiful interpretation of death. Then they give their unqualified advice to listener questions about how to craft an amazing elopement/cityhall wedding, how to handle mom guilt regarding working as a mom versus working outside the home, and how to set up boundaries with overbearing relatives regarding pregnancy and beyond? Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedep303.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

Elizabeth and Andy start off what they later crown, "the worst podcast ever" by discussing multiple topics surrounding fast food and missed opportunities. Then they give their unqualified advice to listener questions about Andy's knowledge of cults, whether to navigate different love languages or bounce, and how to turn a long distance relationship into a short distance relationship early on? Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedEp302.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

Elizabeth and Andy discuss the dismal state of affairs in the world, how to brand oneself for success and what their dream summer away would be! Then they give their unqualified advice to listener questions about how to convince a boyfriend to move to LA for some fun when he's not interested, and how to get your partner to pitch in more with housework when the scales are tipped significantly in the other direction? Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedEp301.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

Elizabeth and Andy celebrate their lucky 300 by sharing Elizabeth's most humiliating fantasy ever and Andy's very sweet hope for the future of this podcast! Then they give their unqualified advice to listener questions about how to support a sister through divorce when you suspect she's the trashbag in the situation, how to navigate a cleaning person who broke something in your home without acknowledging it, how to rebuild trust in a marriage after a suspected betrayal, what the best way is to be politically active without having to make phone calls, and how to set boundaries with your pot dealing neighbor when you really love his bud? Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedEp300_3.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

Elizabeth and Andy explain the great and the not so great of what caused their absence last week, and then Elizabeth discovers that her rage is being misdirected at her sweet, well meaning husband! Before entering QUITE a political pocket, they give their unqualified advice to listener questions about how to dodge social events with a friend's ex, whether or not to tell another woman that her now boyfriend cheated on you with her, if one is supposed to scrub their social media of an ex's presence after a breakfup, and if it's kosher to move other people's laundry from the dryer when you're waiting your turn? Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedep299.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

Elizabeth and Andy both have their own very important announcements to make today! Both have to do with good things coming to an end! Then they give their unqualified advice to listener questions about how to form a good relationship with a future mother in law who is bad at boundaries, how to navigate a spouses friendship that seems toxic or negative, and if Elizabeth and Andy stand by their answer to the question of whether or not to have a third child? Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedEp298.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

Elizabeth and Andy discuss what it might take to get people to email back, and what it will take creatively and in careers to get that r-e-s-p-e-c-t! Then they give their unqualified advice to listener questions about how to move forward without a toxic sister interfering in your life/marriage, how to be your own support system through a breakup from the person you would normally turn to in times of need, and how to put yourself out there to be open for dating but also how to be okay with being single for a while? Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedEp297.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

Elizabeth and Andy discuss their fave topic - autonomous cars - after Elizabeth got the inside scoop on a recent flight, as well as a very special "sign" she experienced on her trip back to St. Louis. Then they give their unqualified advice to listener questions about how to support a sister when her relationship doesn't seem quite right, how to deflect a nosy and pushy mother in law, and how to navigate a tricky and hurtful friendship situation? Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedEp296.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

Elizabeth and Andy discuss the meaning of life, and their gratitude for the life roll of the dice they got before giving their unqualified advice to listener questions about how to manage anxiety about relationships after some relationship PTSD, and how to dig deep to make major moves in creative work, if it's okay to let a friendship fade even if she's going to be a bridesmaid, and at what age do boys become grown ass men? Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedEp295.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

Elizabeth and Andy discuss the merits of podcasting - to continue or not to continue? Plus her new phone, and of course some more discussion about their future documentary on pubic hair. Then they give their unqualified advice to listener questions about how to navigate interviewing family for a blog that would explore tense family dynamics, what to do about a husband who is "rockin' the bed" on his own after lights out, whether or not to give a boyfriend another chance who isn't stepping up for your kids, how to handle a mother in law and husband who won't compromise in their treatment of each other, what to do about family reactions to the choice to leave a toxic sister out of your wedding invites, and lastly how to continue writing with creative freedom when your blog has caused a boundary-less mother in law to react negatively? Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedEp294.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

Elizabeth and Andy discuss the cliffhanger update on her recent LA facial experience, as well as their new documentary idea. Then they give their unqualified advice to listener questions about what to do in Vegas if clubbin' (tm) ain't your thing, and how to navigate new life as an activist with a spouse who is not interested? Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedEp293.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

This episode begins with a riveting segment called what are Elizabeth and Andy's neighbors doing in real time? Then they discuss another nail biter - whether or not wipes are flushable - before giving their extremely unqualified advice to listener questions about how to navigate on online relationship when you don't have much experience, how to proceed having political discussions with those you don't agree with, whether or not to maintain a relationship with a father figure who is toxic, how to be supportive of a partner who suffers from depression while still having a voice in the relationship, and whether or not to move on from an old flame who still is in a limbo/friend zone? Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedEp292.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

Short but sweet! Elizabeth and Andy discuss the costs and cons of living a creative life in LA before giving their unqualified advice to a single listener question about how to move on from a long term relationship and breakup that blindsided you? Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedEp291.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

Elizabeth and Andy discuss a recent revelation they had both about her secrets and also her SECRET TO GREAT SKIN! (or maybe not) Then they give their unqualified advice to listener questions about how to be there for a struggling friends' kids, how to manage the micro frustrations of marriage and parenthood without making them macro, what to do about gifts from in laws that feel extremely loaded, how to adopt the right dog for a rambunctious family, and how to potentially forge a romantic path with someone who has been an important friend? Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedEp290.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

Elizabeth and Andy discuss her love language and how that definitely involved a surprise serenade by 311. Then they quickly dive into giving their unqualified advice to listener questions about setting boundaries and communication around sex without removing all the sexy, how to broach the subject of hurt feelings to a sibling regarding your child's birthday celebration (or lack thereof), how to navigate boundaries on social media with coworkers, how to know if you want kids or not and when is the right time to know, whether to include someone in your social circle who you do not like, how to learn to feel your feelings when you are depended upon to keep it all together, and lastly, how to set healthy boundaries with a toxic mother? Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedEp289.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

Elizabeth and Andy discuss the heroism of law enforcement, why Elon Musk might be slightly overrated in Elizabeth's opinion, and Andy's new awesome studio before giving their unqualified advice to a bunch of dog questions - how to navigate neighbors' whose kids won't leave your dog alone, what to do about spotting a dog locked in a car, and how to train a beagle to stop sniffing every person who passes. PLUS questions about getting a friend to stop coming to you with relationship crisis', how to support a partner who is falling into a dark depression, and how to be a great gift-giver like Andy? Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedEp288.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

Elizabeth and Andy discuss his experience as Juror number 5, humans as animals versus humans as god, and they form a loose pact to embark on a meditation journey together! Then they give their unqualified advice to listener questions about whether to make plans to get out of a long distance relationship or move to the same city, how to navigate a tricky relationship with a new mother in law figure, how to get engaged in a non traditional way that will please the parents, and how to help a sister who is gunning for a champagne wedding on a beer budget? Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedEp287.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

Elizabeth and Andy discuss Andy's recent Craigslist purchase and subsequent sale, whether or not to stain an Ikea purchase before giving their unqualified advice to listener questions about how to get over a chronic crush, how to speak to and raise children around spirituality and religion, and how to broach the subject of becoming parents with a spouse who seems eternally reluctant? Enjoy! 

Direct download: TotallyMarriedEp286.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

285 - Very Unqualified Advice!

Elizabeth and Andy discuss whether or not they should keep discussing politics! Then they give their very unqualified advice to listener questions about finding a middle road with your husband who has a lower libido than you, how to move out from home and start your true life in a more accepting community, how to navigate becoming a vegetarian, and whether or not to return an item of jewelry that's not your style after being gifted by your mother in law? Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedEp285.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

284 - How Do You Bounce Back?

Tough days in casa Rosen! Elizabeth and Andy discuss how to bounce back, a new "political pocket" and too many other things before giving their unqualified advice to listener questions about how to navigate life after having an abusive mother, how to move on from a broken heart and a relationship ending with no closure, and whether "man-children" will grow up naturally or if there needs to be more inspiration to do so from their partner? Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedEp284.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

283 - Visualizing For The Win!

Elizabeth and Andy discuss how visualization can set your mood straight before giving their unqualified advice to listener questions about how to find better communication between stressed spouses, how to get on the same parenting page with your spouse, what to do about a long term friendship that has taken a turn after some disturbing family drama, and how to handle receiving and asking for creative feedback? Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedEp283.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 11:00pm PST

282 - A Rough Start But Still In The Game!

Their baaaack! Elizabeth and Andy discuss why they went MIA for the beginning to 2017, and then discuss the state of the world, and how Elizabeth's inherent nosiness paid off recently before diving into listener questions about an inappropriate attempt at helping by a friend that needs to be shut down, how to voice your differing opinions to family members without creating conflict, and how to engage a partner in conversation or how to learn how to get each other to engage in a way that is meaningful to you both? Enjoy!

Direct download: TotallyMarriedEp282.mp3
Category:kids, family -- posted at: 10:30pm PST

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